


Never Looked Better

by ohnoscarlett



Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M, None - Freeform, this is pretty tame.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-30
Updated: 2010-01-30
Packaged: 2018-11-01 14:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10923600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohnoscarlett/pseuds/ohnoscarlett
Summary: Spencer is the prince.  Brendon is the frog.  (Written for theunnat_bandomchallenge.





	Never Looked Better

**Author's Note:**

> Spencer is the prince. Brendon is the frog. (Written for the unnat_bandom challenge.)

Title: Never Looked Better  
Author: Cara [](http://ohnoscarlett.livejournal.com/profile)[**ohnoscarlett**](http://ohnoscarlett.livejournal.com/)  
Band: Panic! At The Disco  
Pairing: Brendon/Spencer  
Wordcount: 3685  
Rating: PG-13 (language, adult situations)  
Beta: [](http://cloudlessclimes.livejournal.com/profile)[**cloudlessclimes**](http://cloudlessclimes.livejournal.com/) , [](http://kueble.livejournal.com/profile)[**kueble**](http://kueble.livejournal.com/) , [](http://tuesdaysgone.livejournal.com/profile)[**tuesdaysgone**](http://tuesdaysgone.livejournal.com/)  
Summary: Spencer is the prince. Brendon is the frog. (Written for the [](http://unnat-bandom.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://unnat-bandom.livejournal.com/)**unnat_bandom** challenge.  
Warnings: None, this is pretty tame.

 

_Once upon a time there was a handsome young prince. He lived in a grand palace, surrounded by his family, yet he was very sad. His best and oldest friend had drifted away like a leaf on the autumn wind, leaving our prince alone, friendless. This was indeed a terrible fate, so the lonely prince trapped his heart in bands of iron to keep it from bursting in sorrow. In this fashion, our prince grew cold and selfish, relying on his possessions for comfort and pleasure._

_And in this way, we find our prince._

***

Spencer wandered the palace grounds alone. He had left his sisters indoors. It wasn't proper for ladies to tarry out-of-doors; they would burn, and that was unseemly. They would never find husbands that way.

Spencer did not have that problem. Spencer was ruined.

Spencer's betrothed had broken their contract and left him. _Left him!_ No explanation. No apologies. The worst part of it was that Jonathan had taken Ryan with him. And Ryan had been Spencer's best and only friend. No one wished to be aligned with Spencer now.

The palace grounds were so vast. Spencer was able to secret himself away and spend his days unmolested by well-meaning relatives or courtiers. He went often to the oasis, an explosion of greenery at the edge of a generally dry and dusty expanse of landscape. Spencer never really understood why his ancestors had created such a thing, but he liked the pond, and he liked the trees and the mossy ground. Furthermore, it was too far out for his sisters to bother to find him.

The oasis was working out just fine for him until he managed to bobble his golden ball into the pond. Never you mind why Spencer has a golden ball. He's a prince. He can have a golden ball if it pleases him.

It did not please him to have said golden ball on the bottom of the pond.

"Well, _fuck_ ," said Spencer as he watched the golden ball sink slowly out of sight.

"Yeah," said a small voice. Spencer leaped to his feet, startled, and looked around for the source of the voice, but no one had intruded on his solitude. The only thing he could see was a large green frog. Spencer leaned down and peered at the frog, because _surely_ \--the frog twitched and Spencer jumped away with a yelp. When he calmed his racing heart, Spencer would have sworn that the frog was laughing at him.

"You _can't_ be..." Spencer hissed. The frog sat up as tall as his little legs would allow and looked straight at him. It was disconcerting.

"I can't be what?" he asked with a polite tilt of the head. Spencer sat down hard on the mossy ground.

"You're a talking frog," said Spencer.

"That I am," the frog croaked agreeably. "I have been many things."

"Great," Spencer replied, wiping his hands on his pants. He was talking to a _frog_. Well, he may as well make the most of it. "Could you possibly..?"

"I might, possibly. If you could finish a sentence on the first try."

Spencer fought the urge to kick the frog into the pond. It took a minute. The frog waited.

"Could you possibly fetch my ball? I dropped it, and it now lies at the bottom of the pond, as you see." Spencer was very proud of himself for not snapping.

"What will you give to me in return for this favor?" the frog asked. Spencer was flabbergasted.

" _I'm your prince!_ You should--" Spencer shouted.

"I'm a _frog_ , man," the frog interrupted calmly. "I kind of do as I please, prince or no prince." Spencer snapped his mouth shut and scowled. It was true, after all. He thought about it.

"I'll give you whatever you like. Pearls? Jewels? That's reasonable," Spencer suggested. The frog actually rolled his eyes at him.

"What would I do with that? I'm a frog, remember?" The frog paused and Spencer shrugged. His ball was lost, it seemed. "I'll get your ball for you if you promise to be my friend. Take me home with you. I can come to dinner, sleep over. It'll be fun."

"Seriously?" Spencer was dubious. "You don't want anything?"

"Nope," replied the frog with a little bounce. "Just be my friend."

"Done. Now, if you don't mind..." Spencer gestured toward the pond. The frog grinned.

"Of course, my friend." Then he turned and splashed (unnecessarily, thought Spencer) into the water and disappeared.

The frog was gone for a long time. When he finally returned, he carried the golden ball in his mouth. He crawled up the bank and laid the ball gently at Spencer's feet. Spencer looked down, grimacing at the trace of slime, then bent and grasped the ball. He straightened, turned on his heel, and left without a word.

***

Spencer returned to the palace and continued about his business. He completely forgot about the frog. A whole day passed in the usual manner; that is, until Spencer was in the middle of dinner with his family. There was a floppy, squashy sound at the door. They didn't pay it any mind. Then, a tiny voice could be heard.

" _Prince Spencer, come open the door!_ "

Spencer was astounded by the audacity of someone demanding that he himself get up and go to the door. So astounded, in fact, that he did it. He threw open the door to emptiness.

Spencer stood there for a moment feeling foolish. Then, as his gaze dropped, he saw the frog. And promptly slammed the door.

"Whatever is the matter, my love?" asked the Queen. Spencer inwardly cringed. He hated pet names, particularly those bestowed upon him by his mother, who seemed to forget he had grown past the age of five.

"It's nothing, Your Majesty," Spencer replied smoothly.

"Has someone come to get you?" asked the King. Spencer sighed. He really couldn't dodge that one.

"It's only a frog, Your Majesty," he said resignedly.

"And what does a frog want with you?" the King probed. Spencer explained. While he explained, damp fidgeting could clearly be heard on the other side of the door.

" _Did you forget your promise, Prince Spencer?_ " came another querulous cry. The King looked at Spencer sharply.

"If you made a promise, my son, then you must keep it. Open the door."

Spencer opened the door, thinking about promises made and broken.

The frog sat neatly at the center of a marble tile, seemingly grinning gleefully. Spencer motioned for him to enter, and the frog did, following him smartly to the table. Spencer seated himself once again, smoothing his napkin across his lap. As he reached for his water glass, Spencer could feel the frog looking at him, so he glanced down.

"Lift me up beside you," the frog said.

"Don't be ridiculous," Spencer replied, rolling his eyes. The King and Queen, however, gave him a look--a very telling look. So Spencer reached down and grasped the frog carefully and placed him on the chair next to him.

"I can't see," said the frog. Spencer moved him to the table. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Spence did have manners, even if he did act a bit churlish from time to time.

"Oh, Spencer! He's darling!" cried Spencer's sister, the Princess Jackie.

"Do introduce us!" cried Crystal, her twin.

"Ladies," Spencer said with a mocking flourish. "May I introduce you to... I'm sorry, do you have a name?"

"Of course I have a name," snapped the frog, "it's Brendon." Spencer cleared his throat.

"Ladies," he began again. "May I introduce you to the right honorable frog Brendon. Brendon, these are my sisters, the Princesses Jackie and Crystal. I like to call them Jack and Crys. They hate it."

Brendon bowed as low as his little frog legs would allow. The Princesses were charmed.

"Are we finished?" Spencer asked the frog.

"Quite."

"Excellent."

"Aren't you going to share your dinner with me?" Brendon asked with a tilt to his head.

"Seriously?" Spencer asked. The frog simply looked at him unblinkingly until Spencer slid his plate over to where the frog could reach it easily.

Once the frog had eaten his fill, he looked to Spencer expectantly again.

"I'm tired from the long journey. Take me to your chambers so I may rest."

"You've got to be kidding me," replied Spencer, taken aback.

"Were you not paying attention when we were bargaining?" asked Brendon.

"Be on your way, Spencer," said the King, "it's not right to turn your back on someone who helped you in your time of need." Spencer sourly noted that his father did not mention breaking promises again.

Spencer took the frog upstairs to his chambers, and when he got to his room, set the frog down in the corner nearest the door while he prepared himself for bed. It really came as no surprise when the frog plopped down onto the coverlet beside him.

"No ' _lift me into bed, Prince Spencer_ '?" he wondered. The frog grinned his toothless smile.

"It was a jump I felt I could make on my own," he replied.

"Rather presumptuous, don't you think?" suggested Spencer.

"What, you have to protect your honor from a frog?" the frog laughed. "There's nothing I can do to harm you, other than tell your father you're being a prick, which he can see for himself."

Spencer sighed and lay back against the pillows. He watched as the frog made himself comfortable.

"So why have you attached yourself to me, anyway?" Spencer asked curiously.

"I told you; I wanted a friend," said the frog, matter-of-factly.

"Aren't the other frogs playing nice?"

"You may have noticed that I'm not exactly your average frog..."

"Yes. Now that you mention it..."

Spencer and the frog-- _Brendon_ , he kept reminding himself--stayed up much of the night while the frog told Spencer his story. He had been a musician, and had crossed an old-timer. Whether he had been jealous of Brendon's talent, or wanted him to marry his daughter, Brendon never specified, but it was clear that he had been waylaid, struck over the head, and woke as he now was.

"I'm a nice guy!" Brendon insisted.

"You're kind of pushy," Spencer pointed out.

"I get things done!"

"Uh huh. Sure you do," Spencer yawned. "That's why you're still a frog."

***

Brendon managed to stay in the palace with Spencer for many days. Spencer got used to his strange company quickly. He took Brendon often to the pool, for he needed to remain moist, after all, and actually laughed when Brendon splashed and frolicked with his sisters. But Spencer and Brendon found they enjoyed many similarities in taste, and did many things together.

Brendon told Spencer of things he missed from before his transformation; things he couldn't experience as a frog. Favorite foods--Spencer requested them for dinner. Entertainment--Spencer attended events with a frequency he hadn't managed in years. Like when he was being courted, and before. Moreover, he enjoyed them, which made his sisters look at each other in wonderment and his parents just shrug their shoulders. Spencer had been miserable, and he had taken pains to ensure everyone else was as well. Now, he balanced the frog on the arm of his chair, or on his knee, and he chatted. No one dared to ask why the prince had taken to carrying a pet wherever he went; and a distinctly unfashionable one, at that.

Eventually, though, Brendon hopped up on Spencer's knee and looked up at him seriously.

"I need to go back to the pond," he said.

"Why? Don't you get everything you need here?" asked Spencer. The frog got shifty.

"I just need to go," he repeated, and hopped down.

***

Spencer avoided the oasis. Something was wrong with him, apparently, since the frog was in such a hurry to abandon the friendship he had sought so ardently. The frog could keep his oasis.

But Spencer kept finding himself doing things with the frog in mind. Including spending time in the archives and the library, researching. Spencer wondered what had turned Brendon into a frog in the first place. And he wondered what it was that could possibly turn him back.

***

The weather had been inclement for days, and everything was damp. Spencer was thoroughly wet by the time he reached the oasis, and was even wetter when he delved inside and found the pond. It contributed to his mood: he was annoyed.

"Brendon!" he yelled from the mossy bank. " _Brendon!_ "

"No need to shout," came a little voice from the rushes. Spencer watched as the frog clambered his way up the bank.

"There you are," he smiled. "I think--I may have--I've found something."

"Have you now?" said Brendon.

"I have," said Spencer. The frog looked resigned, inasmuch as a frog could look anything at all. But Spencer could tell.

"Do you see," the frog continued gravely, "why I couldn't stay on with you? I couldn't put you in that position. I couldn't ask it of you."

"You know of the transformational magic," stated Spencer.

"I do," said the frog. "I couldn't ask, in the name of our friendship, for you to kill me."

"But could you do it for love?"

The frog disappeared into the dark water with nary a splash.

***

In the library, Spencer found some very old books--books he was certain hadn't been read in hundreds of years. In these books Spencer found mention of magic and of shapeshifting. Spencer knew that there were beings out there who could change their form at will, but that was not what he was looking for. He had been looking for evidence of magical transformation. And he found it.

He didn't like what he found.

***

"Please come back to the palace with me," Spencer entreated. "You seemed to enjoy it. It must be better than being outside all the time."

"There are some benefits to living in the wild," said the frog. Spencer pursed his lips and tried again.

"As your friend, I beg you, come back to the palace. Please, Brendon."

"You can carry me this time. It's a long way," said the frog, yielding finally to Spencer's whim.

***

"I thought we could discuss our options," Spencer suggested to the frog once they were comfortably established in his chambers again.

"Our options?" Brendon wondered, half paying attention.

"For turning you back into a man," said Spencer. The frog cocked his head and looked at him strangely.

"Don't you like me as a frog?" Brendon teased.

"Of course! You're a lovely frog!" Spencer sputtered. Brendon laughed.

"What if I'm not a lovely man?" Brendon posited. Spencer straightened, jutting out his chin, seemingly offended.

"That doesn't--it wouldn't--"

"Ah. Should we make a list?" Brendon brought the subject back around.

"If you like."

"Then we can check them off when they don't work," Brendon mumbled dejectedly. "Gonna be a real short list."

They did make a list.

1\. wait it out  
2\. kiss  
3\. spend the night  
4\. sex  
5\. beheading

"You can already check off a couple of those, you know," Brendon pointed out. "I have been a frog for a very long time. I don't think 'waiting it out' is going to do anything." Spencer crossed it off the list. "And spending the night, too. I've stayed over a couple times. Still a frog." The list was augmented again.

1\. ~~wait it out~~  
2\. kiss  
3\. ~~spend the night~~  
4\. sex  
5\. beheading

Spencer and Brendon sat and stared at the list together, willing it to change. It got awkward. Spencer squirmed.

"You haven't--you haven't tried anything else?" Spencer asked softly.

"I am still a frog, as you can see. Nothing has worked." Brendon's little green head hung low. "I had some amphibious sex... Strangely unsatisfying."

Spencer was horrified, and Brendon laughed his froggy laugh until he couldn't breathe. Spencer flicked him with his finger, but when Brendon turned a wounded look up at him, he stroked his head in apology.

"I could just--"

"Oh no you couldn't!" Brendon cut him off. Spencer scooped him up and kissed him anyway.

1\. ~~wait it out~~  
2\. ~~kiss~~  
3\. ~~spend the night~~  
4\. sex  
5\. beheading

"I thought you were going to suggest--"

"Oh, _hell_ no," Spencer protested. "You can stay a fucking frog, if it comes down to that. I draw the line at bestiality."

" _That's_ where you draw the line? Not at, oh, _murder?_ " Brendon hissed. Spencer was taken aback.

"What do you mean?"

"Look at the list, Spencer! You essentially have to want to kill me-- _try_ to kill me--to get me to change back. That's what it's coming down to. Why would you even want to have me change back if you're so angry that you'd have me dead first? What's a fuck, compared to that?"

"Who says I'd be angry?" Spencer retorted coldly.

"How many men have you killed before, Spencer?" Spencer opened his mouth and snapped it shut again, refusing to look at Brendon. "I thought so. Not many warrior princes these days. Killing a man is ever so different from killing a frog. My skin may be green, but inside, my heart beats as a man. Could you stop it?" Brendon sat, bright green in his anger, staring at his webbed feet. "I think I'm going back to the pond."

"Let me help you with that."

Spencer snatched Brendon up from the little cushion where he sat beside him and hurled the frog out the window.

***

Spencer shook. It was a long way down to the ground from his chambers. He couldn't look. He just knew; he'd just committed murder. No matter that Brendon was a frog; he was a _person_ inside that tiny green suit. And Spencer, his only friend, had killed him.

Spencer grew cold. He lay on his bed and didn't even bother to pull the covers over himself. It didn't matter. His life was forfeit. He had taken Brendon's life literally into his hands and dashed it upon the rocks. What kind of prince, what kind of _person_ does that to a friend? No wonder he was alone.

Spencer cried bitter tears.

***

"Spencer, dear brother, wake up."

Someone shook Spencer until he opened his eyes. It was his sister.

"Leave me be, Jackie," he moaned. She persisted.

"Someone waits on you in the drawing room."

"I'm in no fit state to entertain today," he snapped. Spencer was awake now, and angry, mostly at himself.

"It would do you good to remember not to speak to ladies in such a tone," she chided. "Furthermore, you are a prince, and you have duties which must be fulfilled whether you are in a 'fit state' or no." She jabbed him viciously with the point of her finger. "Now _move_ , or I'll send in our lady mother."

"Nobody wants that," Spencer grumbled.

Spencer took a cursory glance at himself in the mirror. He looked fine, but then he generally looked fine, if not better than fine; very good, in fact. He was, after all, a Handsome Prince.

Spencer blindly followed Jackie down to the drawing room. Seated there were his mother and father and Crystal. It was a happy family scene. As Spencer took it in, somewhat dazed, he noted that they were not alone. A young man perched on the settee. Dark hair somewhat in need of attention, glistening dark eyes, a generous mouth, and... Spencer would have sworn that he had met him before.

At his entrance, the young man stood. It was awkward, as if he hadn't been on his feet in quite some time, whether in illness or injury. Spencer crossed the room and extended a hand in greeting. The young man grasped it in both of his and smiled shyly. Spencer didn't know what to make of him. His mother spoke up.

"Spencer, dear, I do believe..."

Spencer stopped listening.

The young man was damp.

Spencer hauled the young man bodily out of the room. The King and Queen watched, speechless, while the princesses smirked. When they were gone, the Queen turned to her husband.

"He really does have the most atrocious manners."

***

Spencer dragged the unresisting young man halfway down the corridor before he came to his senses--or rather, lost them completely. He slumped down the wall, taking his unsteady companion with him.

"It's _you_ ," Spencer gasped. His hands grasped and clutched jerkily at the young man's shirt and vest, seemingly of their own accord.

"I fell," he said, voiced pitched low so it wouldn't carry in the empty hall. "I fell, and then I struck the water. It was so hard that it felt like my skin exploded..." He paused for a long moment before looking up at Spencer. "I guess it did."

"I can't believe..." Spencer breathed. He reached up, ghosting over pale features and unruly locks. "It's really you. _Brendon_."

The great, luminous eyes were the same; the quick smile, the same. There was a faint smattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks, and Spencer found himself mesmerized at the tiny detail, swiping his thumb over them again and again. Brendon leaned into Spencer's gentle touch, stilling his hand on his cheek. Brendon smiled shyly and it took Spencer's breath away. He gasped, and Brendon looked up at him, alarmed.

"My heart," Spencer began. "I had trapped it away, to keep it safe so no one could hurt me again..." Brendon's hand covered his and squeezed. "But the bands have fallen away."

"I heard them fall," said Brendon.

Spencer pulled Brendon toward him until he could smell the damp of the oasis that lingered around him, until he could feel his breath on his skin. Then Spencer kissed him. They met with an urgency bred of a thousand years of myth and a summer of longing. It made Brendon gasp, and Spencer deepened the kiss until they were both breathless and wanting.

Brendon pressed his forehead to Spencer's and twined his fingers into his hair. He smiled again and Spencer shivered.

"I am afraid..." Spencer whispered. Brendon soothed him.

"I have always kept my promises, my prince."


End file.
